The River Wild

An amazing school year has come to a close. I've had an awesome June full of professional development opportunities where I've been inspired and uplifted by my Professional Learning Family from around the world. But, now comes the transition to summer mode. To go from a school year full of a tightly scheduled calendar to a summer full of all the time in the world should be complete bliss. I now have countless hours to spend with family and friends, write, read, nap, complete home projects, binge watch TV shows, explore new innovative ideas, and play. However, I find myself paralyzed by this new found freedom. I have endless hours to do all that I long to do during the school year, and yet I don't know what to do with it all. I nap and I feel lazy. I am productive and I feel like I should be relaxing. I have a stack of books to read and I don't know which one I want to start. I sit down to write and my mind is blank. It sounds ridiculously silly...believe me I KNOW! I feel guilty even expressing my struggle. As I ponder this crazy phenomenon I face each summer, I grapple with what causes me to feel like this. Why do I feel so overwhelmed by this blessing of time that has been given to me and why is it making me feel so discouraged?

I am from Southern Oregon, so river rafting is huge part of our Summer recreational opportunities and seems like a well fitting metaphor for how I'm feeling. When the school year starts, I push off into a fairly calm section of the river and start paddling. Before long I am swept into the swift current and row left to right to keep balance and avoid all the rocks and obstacles along the way. I have to keep extreme focus and work closely with my rafting crew to make sure that we are all making the right moves. It's an adrenaline rush. Sometimes we make it through the rapids successfully. Sometimes we flip the raft and scramble to get back in. It's a rush of excitement that sometimes leaves me breathless. Luckily, there are short stretches of calm waters where we have an opportunity to catch our breath, reflect, and laugh before the rapids pick up again. There are many twists and turns and quick decisions to make that make for a turbulent, yet exhilarating ride. When the rafting adventure is over and we float into calm waters to our pick-up destination, I feel a special bond with my crew. We've faced each rapid with courage and determination and though feel exhausted, we are amazed at what a phenomenal experience it's been. We've each gained a little more confidence and courage to tackle a slightly higher class rapid when we embark on our next rafting adventure.

This past school year has most definitely been a wild river full of twists, turns, and fast moving currents. I would rank it as a Class IV rapids {long, difficult rapids, narrow passages, turbulent water that requires precise maneuvering and send hearts racing.} It required skilled navigation and teamwork to keep afloat and there were times that I felt like just bailing the raft and swimming to the shore. Yet, with the help of my team I successfully navigated the rapids and have grown so much in the process. It was a landmark year for me. One that I won't ever forget.

​So now I am in the calm waters of summer. I am exhausted, yet missing the adrenaline rush that my students bring; the laughter, the noise of learning, and the passion and joy that fills the classroom. Don't get me wrong, I need the calm waters....I just have a difficult time transitioning to them sometimes. For this short time, I will savor the weeks I have to float by resting and being okay with the quiet and peaceful (sometimes boring) days of summer. I am grateful that I long for the adventure of teaching and the adrenaline rush that it brings because if I was too comfortable floating, I wouldn't want to get back in the rapids for another adventure. Thank you to all who jumped in the raft with me this past year, you mean more to me than you could possibly know!
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